Beijing Birthday

I just had a lovely 25th birthday weekend spent with my friend Sean in Beijing. One of the greatest things about Tianjin is that there is a bullet train that carries you at over 339 km/hr to arrive in less than 30 minutes in Beijing. Tianjin is a nice city, but it still is very isolated-- One of the fellow foreign teachers said it is "China's largest village." This is such a true statement because there is still that 'village mentality' that reigns in this city. It definitely is not as cultural as Beijing, even though its population is over 12 million.

It was so great this weekend being able to walk around and not constantly be stared at. Beijing is home to a ton of expats, so one more white chick walking around is nothing new. In Tianjin, however, I am always being pointed at and whispered about for they are none too subtle here. Most of my students say I am the first foreigner they have ever met-- oh joy, once again with the celebrity/pariah dichotomy going on haha. Hence, the reason the trip to Beijing was so refreshing was because I could blend in (not necessarily with the Chinese, but with the other expats hah).

Making this decision to come and live in China, was mainly because I was facing the quarter-century marker. I did not want to celebrate my 25th back home...no offense to friends and family, but I HAD to be somewhere other than Pennsylvania. It is just such a momentous occasion for me because I never really pictured my life past the age of 25. I did not want the reality to be that I was living at home and did not possess a real job hahah So now I am in China trying to come up with a 5 year plan (I have never planned longer than a few months in advance before) and this milestone birthday seems like a good time to start. Wish me luck or else my parents had better watch out-- for I will be moving back in! eeks hahahaha

"China Belly"... it is never just a fart

:: THIS POST MIGHT NOT BE SUITABLE FOR YOUNG CHILDREN, MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY, OR THE CHINESE GOVERNMENT TO READ::

I know so many of you are wondering about this topic (and some might be grossed out--STOP READING) so I have finally decided to talk about IT...AKA, "CHINA BELLY"

Ever since coming to this country, I have feared what all travelers to countries that you cant drink the water fear- incontinence. Let me just tell you all, this is not a one time thing... this is the way of life here. I now fondly refer to it as "china belly" and it happens basically ever day. Even though, I only drink bottled water everything is so different here (food and how it is cooked, what you are eating, cleanliness, etc) that you can not escape this dilemma. I have finally given up the dream of having a regular bowel movement and have now replaced it with the dream that I don't poop my pants! With this said, I give fair warning to travelers- always excuse yourself for it is never just a fart!

Service That Stalks

If you decide to come to China, beware: SERVICE PEOPLE STALK YOU! When entering any store to do a bit a shopping, you end up with a shadow who follows you everywhere you go. This is not just a phenomena that they reserve for westerns, everyone gets a stalker (it is a communist country after all--> Equal stalking status is granted to locals as well). As someone who likes time to browse the selections, this is very disconcerting to have someone hovering RIGHT beside you. I am sure that they think that this is 'excellent customer service' but to be honest I often get put off by this behavior and end up not buying anything.

The staff probably do this for two reasons: Number one, there is actually enough people in China, and you can employ them cheaply, so that every customer has a sales associate/stalker. Number two, this probably cuts down on shoplifting- you definitely need excellent slight of hand skills to lift something in front of the eagle eye of these clerks.

At a small store in any western country there might be a staff of 2 or 3...here there are AT LEAST twice that many. I bet peter pan never guessed his shadow was truly a little chinese woman trying to make him buy sugared almonds...

"Huh?!"... A Chinese student's favorite expression

The reason I was hired to come to China was to teach oral English to University level students. Therefore, I prepared my tentative course syllabus with that in mind. It did not take me long to realize that even though they might be English majors, they are not that great with oral comprehension. The students are excellent with reading or writing- but not with thinking on their feet, which is needed when having a conversation. I thought as a way to get to know them we could play "would you rather" (you give someone two options and they have to pick one of them). It seemed like a good way to break the tension...

Me: Would you rather have a third eye or webbed feet?
Class: Huh?! ::quizzical look, scrunched up faces, disgusted shock::
Me: You have to stand up for one of them. Who would rather have a third eye?
Class: Huh?! ::no one stands, look to their neighbor::
Me: You HAVE to stand up for one of these two! You would all prefer to have webbed feet? Stand up if you would rather have webbed feet.
Class: Huh?! ::still no one stands, mouths open in shock::
Me: Oh never mind...let us try something else

Hypothetical questions... just don't ask them in this country!

From there I moved on to playing "2 truths and 1 lie" which they seemed to understand- THANK GOD! I gave them an example:

1) I have my pilot's license (lie)
2) I did a zipline on top of the tallest mountain in Europe (truth)
3) I was awarded the Presidential and Congressional Award for Volunteer Service to America (truth)

Then I asked them to guess which was the lie and a majority of them did not get it right, BUT at least they were guessing. I then asked them to write down 3 statements and as a class we would go around and guess. I told them to be creative and try to think of things their classmates would not guess-- "not to just say 'I am 20 years old' and in reality you are 19." Oh just an FYI: CHINESE PEOPLE HAVE NO IMAGINATION! I had so many "lies" that were "I do not like basketball"- they do, "I have a sister"- they have a brother, and "I am gay"- wtf?!

Thankfully, that little exercise took up the majority of class time or I would've been screwed. It is like pulling teeth to get them to talk and we are there for ORAL english.

I told you I eat "real food"

All right, after my last post I felt it was necessary to prove that I am eating the local cuisine (and not surviving on McDonald's and weird flavored potato chips). This past week I found myself in some great dining establishments and all by chance. One of the fellow teachers arrived this week and we decided to do some exploring of Tianjin. For our first experience, we hopped into a taxi and with my Chinese guide book in hand, asked the taxi driver: "Can you recommend a nice seafood restaurant?" The taxi driver proceeded to call up someone else to ask for advice, while we sat patiently in the car hoping we did not ask: "Can you make us into seafood?" After speeding around town (and I do mean speeding- with no seat belts), we arrived in the middle of a slum-like area where they had built this palatial restaurant in the middle. With that lovely juxtaposition greeting us, we went into the main lobby where there was tank after tank of live goods. It was then that we realized the taxi driver took us to the best seafood restaurant in town. John and I wandered around trying to figure out exactly what we were supposed to be doing, when finally a hostess took us up to a private dining area meant for six people. Then we were led back to the lobby where we walked around with our hostess and pointed to the dishes we wanted. I am not sure what I was eating exactly, but it was GOOD! With dinner over, we walked outside and realized there were no taxis around. After asking the nice hostess if she could call us a cab, we went back outside. Next thing we see, the hostess is running over the dirt and trying to make her way to the main road- they do not have a number to call for a taxi company, you just flag them down. I felt super guilty making this poor woman run around this area for a taxi. She was unable to get one, so she had us pile into a friend of her's car and they drove us to a main area where we could then grab a cab. So there, I do eat Chinese food...and get into precarious situations!

Tiny onions exist in China too!

So, I hate to admit it but I love the little onions that they put in a Mcdonald's cheeseburger. Don't ask me why, but they are the best aspect of that sandwich. I am happy to report that, yes, China also appreciates these little devils. I gave in and ate at McDonald's because I was so tired of eating ramen and succumbed to the call of the arches.
McDonald's in Downtown Tianjin

Therefore, if any of you fear that when you go abroad your food will be different- do not worry. You can always get a McDonald's cheeseburger with the tiny onions!

((Do not fret I am eating local cuisine... I swear hahah))